That’s Not Romance
In this post we explore what is romantic in fiction and when we can say, ‘That’s not romance.’
One of the best romance books ever written is Pride And Prejudice by Jane Austen. Not only is it exceptionally well-written, but it’s also historical. Two elements that make my heart happy. Granted, when it was written in 1796, it wasn’t written as a historical romance.
The fact that it’s still avidly read, studied in high schools, and tertiary educational establishments, and has had numerous film and television adaptations, testifies to its astounding success. It’s a shame dear Jane never got to see that.
That’s Not Romance
Three modern, amazingly successful ‘romance’ novels that have also had film adaptations are The Notebook, Fifty Shades Of Grey, and Twilight.
I have read and watched The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks. I cried at the end. Fifty Shades Of Grey by E. L. James…I couldn’t get last the appalling writing in chapter one but have read enough about it to know the plot and the characters. Fifty Sheds Of Grey by C T Grey, however, had me laughing from the first page. I did read Twilight by Stephenie Meyer to find out what all the fuss was about. I could see why teenage girls would like it. (Ooh, sparkly vampires.)
But are they romances?
How Does Mr Darcy Differ To The Other Three Men
Mr Darcy is a gentleman.
Grey, Cullen, and Calhoun are classic examples of abusive manipulators. That’s not romantic. That’s icky.
Grey: The entire premise of the Fifty Shades is that women are objects, toys, whose only job is be subservient to a male who can do whatever he likes to her sexually because she signed a contract. She goes along with it at first because she’s in awe of this rich, good-looking man who is showing interest in dull, little, mousey her. Later, it’s because maybe she can save him, change him.
Romantic? No. This is abuse. You could argue, she was a consenting adult. Yes, she was. But there’s that deliberate choosing by Grey of a young woman whose naiveté beggars belief. He didn’t ask an experienced woman of his own age. He went for someone mentally not far out of childhood. A contract is basically a bill of sale. This is human trafficking, even if it’s only Grey taking advantage.
Calhoun: Allie is on a date when Noah pushes his way in, climbs the moving Ferris wheel, putting not only Allie but everyone else on the wheel in danger, and then hangs onto a bar threatening to commit suicide if she won’t go out with him. When she finally agrees, because she’s terrified, he acts as if she was begging him for a date and he’s doing her a favour. When she pulls his trousers down, he threatens to ‘get her’. For ‘get her’ read teach her a lesson for humiliating him.
Romantic? No. This is psychopathic behaviour. This is not a ‘meet-cute’. This is the ‘meet and run for your life, preferably taking out a restraining order’. They do nothing but fight violently for the rest of the movie. It grows tiresome quickly. So why does everyone cry at the end of the movie? You can put that down to James Gardner’s incredible acting.
Cullen: When Bella confronts Edward about how he managed to save her from being hit by a car, he denies his actions and tells her she’s confused. She knows what she saw but his response is, “What exactly was that?” and “Nobody’s going to believe you.”
Romantic? No. This is classic gaslighting.
Darcy: He may be aloof, abrasive, and proud but he never manipulates Elizabeth, he never threatens her, and he never gaslights her. He does have faults, and when Elizabeth points them out, he doesn’t try to defend himself or point out hers. Unlike the others, Darcy is self-aware and from then on tries to overcome his faults. After Elizabeth rejects his marriage proposal, he continues to treat her when next they meet, politely.
Romantic? Well, good manners are always a plus, as is self-awareness and change for the better.
And If They Weren’t Rich And Handsome?
Grey: If Grey was the opposite in looks, on the breadline, lived in a trailer park, and had an underground lair where he tied women up and hurt them, he’d be on America’s Most Wanted!
Calhoun: If he wasn’t nice-looking, Allie would have run a mile, and her date would have called the police. I’m surprised the owner of the Ferris wheel didn’t call them for his reckless endangerment of other people! Yes, Calhoun wrote every day to Allie for a year, declaring his love for her. Thing is she’d left him, so this comes across as stalking.
Cullen: Just because someone sparkles in the sun doesn’t make their gaslighting and death threats acceptable.
Darcy: Apart from their disastrous first encounter, Darcy’s actions toward Elizabeth had nothing to do with his wealth or looks. He is the only one who does something completely unselfish, at cost to no one but himself, saves Elizabeth’s sister’s and her family’s reputation, and asks that his actions remain unknown by Elizabeth and the rest of her family. Why? Because he doesn’t want Elizabeth to feel manipulated, bullied, or obliged into marrying him. THAT is romantic.
What Does Darcy Have That The Others Don’t?
Darcy is the only man of the four you could trust. Trust in a relationship is a foundation upon which love can built. Attraction, infatuation, stalking, lust, drama and sex are not.
So why were the other three books such huge successes?
Everyone loves drama. If they didn’t, soap operas wouldn’t be so popular. There is drama in Pride And Prejudice, but it’s not violent, kinky, or nasty mind-games. And perhaps that’s why Jane Austen’s book is so beloved. The characters are completely relatable to everyone.
The Last Word
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by Elaine Dodge. Elaine is the author of The Harcourts of Canada series and The Device Hunter. Elaine trained as a graphic designer, then worked in design, advertising, and broadcast television. She now creates content, mostly in written form, for clients across the globe, but would much rather be drafting her books and short stories.
More Posts From Elaine
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- The 5 Best Book To Mini-Series Adaptations
- The 5 Best Book To Film Adaptations
- The 5 Worst Book To Film Adaptations
- 5 How-To-Write Books That Have Impacted My Writing
- A Case Study For Deep Theme In Pride And Prejudice
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